to the girls in my house

My Mom Sis And My Puppy.

the music monster

It’s really difficult for me to list 8 songs I like, cos well I hardly listen to any.
I told you mat karna….why did you tag me daa?

Anyway........

1)Tuta tuta ek parinda would probably my favourite song ever. I feel the writer of the song is probably talking of Jesus Christ, and that affects me so much. So much that I feel like crying almost when I hear this song, usually in the car, and my hateful driver, bloody stares with hate in his eyes.

2) Raag yaman is my new favourite raag, and I love the bandish I am now learning…….kesar rangan ki pichkaari.
Also my old fav in yaman is ori eli aari piya bina…

I had gotten till here yester day when my friend called me and I moved from the comp and was overcome by migraine and could not or did not come in front of the comp’s harsh glare again. And my sis tried to listen to songs on the comp which is in my rooms and had to move away cos music can be just noise to me quite often……..very often in fact, and my mom says I have a dead soul cos I don’t listen to music really.
And do realise, whosoever reads this, that most of these songs are what I had had to learn.

3) I like the song ‘kajrare kajrare’, though I absolutely hate Aishwarya, and would sometimes even watch her dance just to hear song. Once saw a woman in pub dance to this and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh! Loved song even more. (Can read up incident in a September or October post on this blog)

4) Rabbi’s bulla ki jaanaa mein kaun I love again mostly because of the lyrics? But quite love the video even.

5) I love the song from sound of music, edelweiss edelweiss. Learnt it at school in Bombay as a kid. I still sing it sometimes when I am not able to sleep and when I am crying. I quite like the crying version of that song. .hahahha.

6) Jamaican farewell ……… another song I had to learn in that school.

7) Remember Diane king? I used to think she was quite hot and I used to like her songs cos they were so about really strong women. And it was like she was sometimes beating up men………not that I like THAT.

8) Asha bhosle’s ye nain dare dare, ye jam bhare bhare, mujhe e e e pine do o o. kal ki kisko khabar? Ek raat hoke nidar mujhe e e e jine do.
Sometimes I substitute pine do for jine do when we are drinking just for effect.

For that’s the ultimate aim of every song’s life right?
To be hummed on by someone who is drunk.

Home Truths -2

What a lot of people know about me: I am honest

What my close friends turned almost foes know about me: I can be manipulative (see am still honest)

What my sis thinks of me sometimes: attention seeking selfish lazy liar, drama queen fat moody sneaky bitch.

What I say of me all the time: “I am so pretty” *standing in front of mirror* …….giggle giggle…….”I am so pretty”….”naa Pom(my sis) am I not pretty?”

What my sis thinks then: pompous attention seeking thinking too much of herself………aaaaaaagh…….”yeah baba you are pretty”

Be scared Be vey scared

The world's worst countries to visit if you're gay.
The list:
1.Uganda
2.Iran
3.Egypt
4.Saudi Arabia
5.Nigeria
6.United Arab Emirates
7.Cameroon
8.Poland
9.Nepal
10.India

TICKLE LOVE PERSONALITY TEST ---- MY RESULT

As an ENFP, you probably find most traditions and rules to be a real bore. Others around you might even see you as a bit of a rebel. It appears that you enjoy standing apart from the crowd. Moreover, because you have such a free spirited, friendly manner, there will usually be a crowd around you to stand apart from. Your special qualities can be very attractive. Among those traits is a high energy level that often keeps you on the move. ENFPs like you are known for being real Renaissance types and having a diverse array of interests. Whether it's in work or play, your type is willing to take more risks than most. In relationships, you can be hard to pin down. Life is a journey not a destination for you. You aren't the kind to falsely lead someone on. It seems you'd rather be evasive than lie to get out of a sticky situation. Because you crave excitement, chances are that you resist getting in to the kind of routine that often comes with commitment. This can sometimes pose a problem if you're paired with someone who needs a lot of structure in their relationship.

Feminism Friday??? i know i wont get more than a B+ for this

Queer’ was a movement that came into existence to encompass all non-heteronormative sexualities. It reminded us that labels and categories can easily become part of oppression. But along the way has the ‘queer’ movement actually constructed an identity that is based on standards that must be met, excluding those who don’t meet these standards?

“I’m permanently troubled by identity categories, consider them to be invariable stumbling-blocks, and understand them, even promote them, as sites of necessary trouble.” -- Judith Butler


As I was talking to a friend of mine who is far from being homophobic and infact calls herself homophilliac, tells me that she doesn’t believe in bisexuality and that one cannot, in her opinion have the best of both worlds. I am of course just 23 and most people I know are of my age and most people I know who even know or think of homosexuality, thinks us bisexuals queerer of the lot. The common perception is that bisexuals are just confused and will probably make up mind one day. The other one is that they are unfaithful, and cannot commit to one partner or to that sex of the partner. I think they, bisexuals are as confused and adulterous as anybody else and not less neither more. Some people falsely believe that bisexuality is about swinging with other couples or singles of both genders. The truth is that bisexuality is about whom you are, not whom you are with. That aside, most bisexual people tend to be attracted to one gender more or less than the other. The degree of attraction towards one or the other can also change over time, even from week to week.

Queer politics questions the unity, stability and political utility of sexual and gender identities. It reminds us that labels and categories can easily become part of oppression. But the question that has been lurking in my mind since my own discovery of ‘queerness’ is: am I queer enough to be counted as a part of the movement. If I include myself in the we of a queer gathering, will I be asked to step away if I’d happened to be in a straight relationship right then?
We are told (making it personal, the we are the bisexual * women on campus right now) that there is only one politics, that of the queer. And politically we are gay. To make a point I will always use words like lesbian or gay and never bisexual, and while reciprocating the other will always say “you the lesbian……” because we let ourselves be encompassed in the mainstream gay politics, and we exist as a b in any lgbt.

I understand the reasons for that. In the process of building a movement, a campaign to claim human rights, there is a need to come together, feel togetherness, share a common ground, and, of course, a common dream. What is otherwise called solidarity. But what can also be called assimilation. Does the ‘queer’ identity subsume other identities under its all-encompassing weight? Is inclusivity a process of creating sameness? Well, not completely, though tendencies exist. The ‘queer’ identity does provide an opportunity for sexually marginalised groups, beyond the peripheries of the LGBT, to come onto the rights-claiming platform, get visibility.





But on a personal (and even in media) basis, I (we) am not taken seriously. This makes my position unstable, for having stepped out of the straight world, and identified myself as bisexual, it can be trifle scary and insulting to be dismissed and kept at the fringe of even this community. And in search of visibility I become twice or even thrice invisiblised.


For unlike what some people think bisexuals cannot be straight sometimes. I am not sometimes gay sometimes straight, I am always bi whether with a man or a women. Can I get married, have kids, build a family, and feel ‘queer’ at the same time?

Is it about believing in an identity, a position from where you challenge the oppressive nature of dominant heteronormativity? Can I be part of a ‘heterosexual’ relationship and claim to be ‘queer’?

Even in media, wherever there is representation of lesbian or bisexual women, there are stereotypes and the flitting character of the bisexual woman who ‘plays for both teams’ becomes the butt of quite a few jokes, or just assumptions which just further damages her image. Take the case of ‘The L Word’, The L Word’s representation of bisexuality reflects popular and sometimes opposing ideas about bisexuality. One belief is that those who identify as bisexual are merely experimenting with their sexuality before they choose to identify as strictly heterosexual or homosexual, thus suggesting that a “bisexual” identity is at best a transitional identity, and at worst a false one.
The second is the belief that everyone has the potential to be attracted to people of either sex; in other words, everyone is at some level bisexual. This has been most clearly expressed by the character of Shane (Katherine Moennig), who stated in the second episode, “Sexuality is fluid, whether you’re gay or you’re straight or you’re bisexual, you just go with the flow.”
Third is the stereotype that bisexuals are sexually promiscuous or indecisive, with the added threat that a bisexual woman could, at any moment, leave her female lover for a man. While Alice is not promiscuous, she is framed by the other characters as indecisive. Dana's aggressive attempts to make Alice "choose" are reflective of how many lesbians see bisexuality, the fact that Alice’s main opportunities to discuss bisexuality occur in defensive situations mean that bisexuality is almost always cast in a negative light.
In addition, as the series has developed, Alice’s interest in dating men has declined while her interest in women—particularly Dana—has taken center stage; underscoring the first assumption that bisexuality is simply a transitional phase. Of course, many bisexual women enter into serious relationships with other women as Alice has with Dana, and there's nothing unrealistic about this. The problem is that none of the show's bisexual characters enter into serious relationships with men.
In The biographic film Frida Early on in the film, Frida asserts her difference and sexual liberation by having sex with her boyfriend in her parents’ home and posing for a family portrait in a full suit, dressed as a man. This is in 1920s Mexico--a conservative Catholic country, so it is unexpected to see her father (Roger Rees) dote on her shocking behavior, even going so far as to joke about her cross-dressing with “I always wanted a son.”
The film touches on the major points of her life, but it primarily focuses on her relationship with Diego. This is a little disappointing since she is so well known as a bisexual woman. The only scenes that show her with women are set in a very masculine erotic frame. The first involves winning a drinking game in order to dance with the stunning hostess and photographer, Tina Modotti (Ashley Judd), at a party. Frida subverts the macho posturing by taking the biggest drink uninvited, then performing a sensual tango with “the prize.” This scene is sexy because it is two beautiful women dancing together, but it also seems very superficial. One almost feels that the intended audience is the male viewer.
The second film moment capturing Frida’s intimate interaction with a woman is her revenge sex with a Parisienne singer in order to get even with Diego. Both scenes are thrown into the movie for titillation as opposed to taking a meaningful look at her relationships with women outside of the marriage to Diego. This is disappointing for a biographic film of her life since it minimizes her non-heterosexual relationships.
CONCLUSION.
What we as ‘queer’ people need to challenge is not just dominant heteronormativity, but also our discomfort with difference. We cannot privilege ‘sexual orientation’ as the most significant sexual difference among us. Or else we are in danger of creating our own sexual ‘lower orders’.


Arunlekha Sengupta,
Roll no 513,
4th semester.

in the absence of you

It’s another season now,
Not summer and not cool either,
And the sun glows bright purple
Reflected in my nails.
My fingers smell of oranges,
Though it’s now another season.
Not too deep, not too low either,
My pool floats me by,
Purple water and a black me.
And I know you’ve had a bath here,
The smell of another fruit overwhelms me,
But it’s another season now.

upon my death

I sit on a pink cloud
Passing by
Over my pink city,
And there lies my home,
Lights still on within,
And nobody seems to be mourning,
Except the peeling paint on the door,
And the moss on the window sill.
My discarded clothes still litter the floor,
And nobody now enters my room,
And the sunset in my room sinks into the lake,
And my pink cloud passes by.

what i did this afternoon

And so cold is my skin,
That the afternoon breeze outside feels like winter.
And me with my purple nails,
Clutch onto my sheets,
Red and yellow they seem this afternoon.
I clutch onto my Colourful sheets
My fingers somewhere in its abandoned frenzy
Has whipped up a cupful of bliss,
And I hold onto my sheets,
for
Bliss in the afternoon
always throws me off balance.

Watermelon woman revisited

http://www.afterellen.com/Movies/2006/3/watermelon.html